It can be a big advantage to be able to appear completely emotionless. Controlling your emotions can help you gain control of negotiations, avoid confrontations and even seem cool. While it may seem like it is easy enough to hide your feelings, it takes a lot of practice to look entirely emotionless. You have to learn to fully control your expressions, your movements, and your words all at the same time.
1. Controlling non-verbal expressions.
Relax your eyes and mouth. The eyes and mouth can express a multitude of emotions. It is important to keep control over them at all times. The best way to do this is by working on your non-expression. A blank face is a look people use to keep others at a distance. You can see this face displayed in almost any crowded elevator. It’s like a do not disturb sign for your face.
To do this:
• Take a moment to consciously relax the muscles in your face. You’d be surprised how tensed-up they can become even if you aren’t experiencing any emotions.
• Poker players make an art form of the expressionless poker face. Study how poker players play without any indication of excitement or nervousness.
• Do not avoid eye contact. Avoiding eye contact can be perceived as an emotional reaction. Just look at the person the same way you would look at a chair or a wall.
2. Watch your movements.
Subtle gestures can be very expressive, even if we are not always consciously aware of them. This is usually the most difficult part of looking emotionless, and no matter how hard you try there is still going to be some small gesture that tells something about how you feel.
To do this:
• Avoid any fidgeting, such as cracking your knuckles or biting your fingernails.
• Do not show any hints that you are tired by rubbing your eyes or yawning.
• Tapping your feet can make you seem nervous.
• Looking down too much can make you seem shy or sad.
While most people can keep a poker face, even poker players’ hands betray them and it is the biggest tell picked up by watchful eyes. Hesitant hand and arm movements can show your fear, uncertainty, anxiety or excitement. Try making only fluid and deliberate movements. Don’t move unless you need to. Then, move decisively and confidently.
3. Maintain emotionless posture.
To do this:
• Avoid showing any emotion with the way you stand or sit.
• Don’t cross your arms. This can be seen as defensive. Keep your arms relaxed and at your sides.
• Sit back in your seat. A relaxed, unconcerned posture is the best way to show how unemotionally involved you are. It also helps put more distance between you and anyone you are with. Leaning forward can make you seem eager or excited.
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