If want to show your girlfriend that you’re thinking of her and make her loved, all without saying a single word, then you need to learn how to hold her romantically. By initiating a welcome, romantic touch, you can deepen your bond with your girlfriend and make her feel special.
Be confident and relaxed. Your touch can communicate many things to her, but what you may not know is it can also communicate your state of mind. If you are feeling nervous, tense, or fearful, your girlfriend will very likely be able to sense it through your touch. If you are feeling nervous about holding your girlfriend, remind yourself she’s your girlfriend for a reason (she likes you!), and that she’s probably hoping you’ll take her hand or put your arm around her. Be confident, but not cocky. While it’s likely your girlfriend is looking forward to your touch, don’t assume you have free access to her body at any time. Be respectful of her space. Calm yourself by breathing in for four seconds, then breathing out for four seconds. Repeat this at least four times and you should begin to feel more at ease. If you’re still nervous, pinch yourself in the fleshy part between your thumb and index finger. Applying pressure to this area can quickly calm your nervous system.
Make sure she’s okay with contact. The easiest way to do this is by simply asking her. Saying “Can I hold you?” is not only sweet, it’s also a way to know 100% for sure she’s comfortable with being touched. You can also try touching her in non-threatening areas, like her upper back or between her elbow and her hand, and watch her reaction. Pay close attention to her body language. People can very accurately read each others emotions via touch if they’re paying attention. If she seems uncomfortable in any way if her muscles tense, she avoids eye contact, or you just get a vibe that she doesn’t like it, stop what you’re doing. Don’t be upset or offended if your girlfriend isn’t in the mood to be touched. It probably has little to do with you some people simply don’t like to be touched. It doesn’t necessarily mean she doesn’t like you.
Consider your environment. If you’re in the middle of the lunchroom or at a family gathering, you probably won’t want to hold her the same way you do when it’s just the two of you sitting on the couch. It can make things awkward for her and the people around you. If you’re around her parents, it might even get her in trouble! When you’re in public, keep things PG–just hold hands, or put your arms around each other, or maybe put your hand in her back pocket. Save the cuddling and really intimate stuff for when you’re alone.
Hold her hand. Holding hands will not only make you feel connected, it will declare to the world: “We are a couple!” Get close to her so that you are shoulder-to-shoulder. You can notice how she reacts to this first touch, and your hands will be close enough so you can hold hers easily. If you’re nervous and your palms are sweating (which is normal and ok, but not always the best feeling sensation), quickly wipe them on your pants before reaching for her hand. Try hooking your pinkie finger with hers. This is a good move if you haven’t held hands yet or you’re nervous it’s very flirtatious and makes it easy for her to drop your hand if she isn’t feeling the hand-holding yet. Slide your hand under hers so that they are palm-to-palm. Lace your fingers through hers so your hands are clasped together. Or try hooking your thumb over hers and wrapping your fingers around the back of her hand the way you would hold your hands if you were making a “begging” gesture. You may want to change positions every few minutes so your palms don’t get too sweaty.
Put your arm around her waist. This is a romantic way to hold your girlfriend if you are walking next to each other or standing and watching something. It is especially good if there is a height difference between you, since you can slide your hand down to her hip or up near her ribs. While walking side-by-side, reach your arm across her back and place your hand on her waist. Gently pull her toward you so she is snuggled against your body, under your arm. Be sensitive to the fact that she might not want to be touched near her stomach. Some girls are a little self-conscious about their waist and may not be comfortable being touched there especially if you squeeze her. If she seems uncomfortable with your hand at her waist, try sliding it up to the bottom of her ribs, or simply putting your arm around her shoulders instead.
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