Counsellor Frank Edem Adofoli
• Divorced couples have been admonished to stop using their children against each other
• According to Counsellor Adofoli, they should settle their differences without involving their children
• He has preached against partners calling out their former husbands or wives on social media
Divorced couples have been admonished to put a stop to public rants as their irresponsible actions can have a toll on their children’s future.
Counsellor Edem Adofoli in an exclusive interview with GhanaWeb bemoaned the lack of respect exhibited by some divorced couples who publicly disgrace each other on social media during a misunderstanding.
According to him, some partners use their children as a weapon against their former husbands or wives, this he said can affect the growth of an innocent child
He said: “When people go through a divorce, they use the children as a weapon to fight. You realize that all the fight is about the children, the man not paying their school fees, one will say they don’t like the school the kids are in. They use the kids to get at each other, some won’t allow you to see the kids. They use the kids to fight their personal battles, you need to think through things or just head to court.
“Divorce is a very difficult and painful decision. No man or woman in their right sense goes into marriage with divorce in their mindset. Taking a decision on divorce is so hard, people have tried their own means, the good and the bad to make their relationship work.”
Counsellor Adofoli again advised men and women not to be quick in responding to a partner who runs to social media for public sympathy during a misunderstanding.
“There is no need of coming to the public to explain things, It is just not important, don’t give that person attention, just let it go. It is a waste of time,” he advised.
Although a divorce can take a toll on you, individuals are being advised not to publicly disgrace their former partners on social media but instead, consult families and counsellors when faced with issues.
“During the divorce, they are thinking about the pains and the frustration they’ve gone through, their loss of time and the mistakes they’ve made but they are not thinking about the future of the kids. You can agree that the relationship can’t be salvaged, you are not going separate ways because you are enemies but because that’s the best option. When a child is involved you can give the child healthy support when you are a healthy parent,” he added.